Texas Bound

This past weekend was exactly what I needed. It was a weekend full of adventure, spontaneity, alone-time, new friendships, catching-up with old friends, celebration, exploration, growing, learning, and late-night chats.

It felt like I was back in college, which was easily one of the best times of my life.

But before all of that could happen, I had to deal with some worry or nervousness about how everyone would react.

With everything that happened with my ex, I wasn't completely sure how my friends, whom I hadn't seen since I got married, would react. In fact, I'd barely even spoken to them since I got married. We were all friends in college, but as far as I knew, they were closer to my ex than they were to me, and would very easily be against me because of her.

My girlfriend was invited to a wedding for a mutual friend of ours, who was the best friend of my ex. The bride assured my girlfriend that she wanted me to be there. But, I had so many reservations to going:

- She was my ex's best friend. Surely she would rather invite my ex.

- I hadn't spoken to her in forever; why would I be invited?

- If I did go, would it cause drama for the bride?

- Was I willing to possibly be cornered by my friends, who would want to know all the gritty details of what happened?

- Once they knew what had happened, would they judge me?

- Would they think that I was a horrible person for not fighting harder for her?

- Would they side with her and alienate me all weekend?

These kind of thought bothered me for a long while until finally I decided I had to just deal with them. I reached out to the bride and voiced my concern about coming, and making sure she wouldn't rather have my ex there. I also mentioned that I didn't want any of my past drama to infect her happiness, because if my ex saw a picture of me at the wedding, surely she would say something to her best friend.

The bride assured me that she would rather I come, and that she could handle my ex. Those were kind words, but it was still a bit hard to believe. They were best friends; there had to be some kind of twist. Right? It's easy to say something via messenger or text, compared to saying it to someone's face.

Well, I continued to worry about it, but decided I would go, if for no other reason than to meet my girlfriend's dad, who lived just a few hours away from the wedding.

On the way to Texas this weekend, my thoughts weren't focused on myself and my nervousness at all. It was just focused on enjoying the time I had with my girlfriend. But as soon as we got to the church, where the bride and two of our college friends were decorating, my nervousness and anxiety flared up.

I felt so awkward.

I was so nervous about what they'd think.

I was so... scared, I guess is the right word?

I saw the bride and our college friends running down the sidewalk, and immediately figured they were running towards my girlfriend. I stood awkwardly waiting for them to embrace, then acknowledge me, expecting some kind of question or judgment.

Instead, I got a massive hug from the bride, who began crying with happiness and all she said was "I'm so sorry for everything you've gone through, but I'm so glad you're here!" Then I got a massive hug from one of my college best friends and she said "I hate what you've gone through, but I've missed you so much!"

I didn't know what to say. All of my expectations on how this mini-reunion was going to turn out were completely destroyed by those two hugs and the words spoken.

I had been fretting over seeing them again for no reason.

In just a matter of minutes, all my discomfort and anxiety had been washed away. Before I knew it, my college best friend and I were sharing funny pictures and laughing like old times, to the point where my girlfriend, the bride and another college friend decided to leave us alone while they caught up and spoke about the wedding.

That was the entire weekend, starting from the time we left Alabama until the time we returned. We stayed up until 1-2am every night talking, laughing, reminiscing, laughing some more, telling stories, and catching up. Like I said previously, it was like being back in college.

I am so thankful that I went to the wedding, because it helped me reconnect with all the people I've missed so much. We are even planning to have mini-reunions every few months, so that we don't go four years without seeing each other again. That was way too long.

Another side of my worry about going to Texas was meeting my girlfriend's father. I was told that he was really big on first impressions, and didn't like sarcasm until he got to know you more. Well, of course, being the sarcastic person I am, this had me concerned.

Again, my concern was unfounded. Her dad and I had a great weekend getting to know each other. We had a full-on nerf-gun war, pulled pranks on my girlfriend, went to dinner, had long chats, played board games, and more. By the end of it, I was dreading having to leave. I had formed a friendship with her dad, step-mom and little brother.

I had never felt as comfortable at dinner with my ex and her parents as I did with my girlfriend. her dad and step-mom. And that was six years of my life. Our friendship got to the point where he even posted a status on Facebook inviting me back whenever I was free, and where we have decided to have a nerf-gun rematch.

As I said before, this weekend was exactly what I needed. It was one of the best weekends I've had in a very long time, helping me cement new friendships, rekindle old ones, and grow closer to them all.

And I couldn't ask for more.