All Because of a Note

One thing that I think is important to talk about is friendship, and just how valuable having a great friend-base is to each person. And right now, I want to talk about one particular friendship of mine. I have referenced this friendship once in a past post when talking about how I had removed people from my life simply because my ex didn't like them, but honestly, it was mainly just one person I had axed.

I won't give out any names, but this person will know who they are as they read this post. And she most likely already does.

But the reason I wanted to talk about this friendship is to highlight just how important this particular person is to me. Yes, I cut this friend out of my life to accommodate my ex's wishes, but recently, I have also discovered that this friend removed herself because my relationship with my ex was draining on her, and she just couldn't handle it anymore.

And looking back, I completely understand that. I can't fault her for that; she was doing what was best for her, just as I was doing what I thought was best for me.

But after everything that happened with my ex, this one particular friend was the only one to reach out and see how I was doing. We hadn't spoken for 3 years, and yet, she was still concerned for my well-being.

Let me tell you something: that right there is true friendship. And after everything I had gone through, I really needed a true friend. Someone who was in my corner when the rest of the world was piling up against me. Someone who knew the situation, but didn't judge me because of any of it, but instead loved me through it. Someone who picked me up when I got beaten down, patted me on the back and pushed me back into the fray because she hadn't given up on me.

That's what a true best friend is. And thankfully, I had met mine when I was 12 years old.

Why she stuck with me through that horrible time, I'll probably never know. But I hope she knows just how much I appreciated that. Just like the guy from my church who stuck with me when I was a wreck, she was an anchor in the storm that was swirling around me. She helped me find stable ground again so that I didn't sink.

She has been one of my best friends for over 12 years now, and even with all our ups and downs, she has stuck it out. Why? I'll never truly understand. But the great thing about it is, I don't even have to know. All I need to know is that no matter what, I can count on her.

I've helped her through a few things, but I honestly believe that she's helped me through even more. She has proven herself time and time again to me, and that has done nothing but strengthen our friendship.

Without her steady and loyal friendship, I honestly don't know where I'd be right now. Even during those 3 years where we didn't speak, I firmly believe that I was in her thoughts, as she prayed for my well-being and my future, even if at the time it seemed that my future wouldn't include her.

That, to me, is the definition of true friendship. She didn't (and never has) expected anything from me; she was simply a great friend, even when I wasn't. And I can just hope that one day I'll be as good a friend back to her as she has been to me.

As Sarah Dessen says in her book Someone Like You, "Life is an awful, ugly place to not have a best friend."

Though I may mess with her constantly, be snippy, play jokes on her, be sarcastic, be sweet, be charming, be naive, or just be plain stupid, I know that she's not going anywhere. Even when she pretends that she's fed up with me, and even when she really is, I know that I don't have to worry about our friendship.

I know that she accepts me for who I am and would never even think about changing anything about me. She loves me like Christ loves the church, despite all my faults and shortcomings. And for this, I love her. As I said, I can only pray that one day I will be as good of a friend to her as she is to me.

We all need a best friend. We all need someone who we know will be there for us through all the crap that life tries to throw at us. We all need someone who can take our sass and dish it right back without getting offended. We all need someone who will carry us through the pits and valleys of life, and who will dance and sing with us when we're standing on top of the world.

We all need someone who will help steady us when we are walking through rocky terrain. And I am so thankful that I found all of those things in my best friend when I was only 12 years old.

And to think, it all started with her passing me a note.